Obsessed

Two months have passed since my last entry and I can tell you: these last two months were emotionally intense!!
I had my best and my worst time in Mallorca; I was short before crying....from joy, but also from despair and anger!

But let's go back to the end of October, to my last post:
As I had planned, I took another break from climbing for recovering my rotten skin, to be able to do some hard climbing again.
After one week my skin seemed to be fine, but with my experiences from last time I decided not to go outside for one more week and just to train a bit in the climbing gym.
After these two weeks I was confident that it would work this time...and yes, it felt good.
I climed in Fraguel and my skin didn't get harmed...incredible, that was something new for me, here in Mallorca! There was nothing to be said against some more outdoor climbing.

This was my "new" project...French Kiss (8b, Fraguel). One day I will come back (with good skin) to do this beautiful line...

The next day I wasn't so lucky...I got a sore on my left middle finger. I went back to indoor climbing for some days and decided to only climb outdoors on the weekends and to train in the gym during the week.
Nice plan again, but reality was something different..
I couldn't even recover my skin with just climbing indoors... probably now I can't show all the emotions I had back then, but I would have liked to drive home immediately and I hated Mallorca!!!!
I hated to be on this cursed island and I hated to be trapped there until February!!!
I knew it wouldn't make any sense to pause again - nothing would change...never! - so I speculated how I could best spent my time on Mallorca until Christmas, when I would go back to Austria for two weeks..
There I stood, a passionate - well, probably more an obsessed - climber, for whom climbing was suddenly no option anymore, though being motivated as hell....what a shit!
But also I didn't want to rest again....I had definitely rested enough.

At the start of this new "episode" I still tried to do some indoor bouldering, but my skin got worse and worse and in the end I was mentally broken. I'm really not exaggerating....I suffered a lot. :-(
After some more thinking I finally I decided that it would be best to work on my lock-off-strenght, as it is for sure one of my limiting factors, as well as body-tension.
In this way I could still work on my climbing skills, but without risking my skin anymore.

During this time of some unwanted distance to climbing, I somehow started to change my mind.
It all began more or less out of nowhere...well no, that's not completely true.
My two closest friends in Mallorca have both a very positive attitude towards life.
Until then I was completely captured in my own climbing world; full of projects....and nothing else!
But now my mind was free, climbing seemed so far away and I started to enjoy other things.
Every single day I learned a lot from these friends and also by myself, being that free...that open minded!

I mean, all my friends try to help me somehow, and I appreciate it, but nevertheless they try to change me, or at least they give me the feeling that they want to change me.
With Davis (one of the two friends mentioned above) I could talk about all the problems bothering me, but he never told me to do this or that, he just showed me that he understands me and this felt much much better than every good advice.
Just by seeing his totally different approach towards climbing and life made me learning and was what changed my point of view.

I still love projecting. It's such an important part of my life to climb hard routes, that give me the feeling of climbing near or at my personal limits...
...but I'm doing it with less obsession now! Even if I maybe have a bad climbing day, I still enjoy being outside with my friends, and enjoying nature and so on.
If I gave everything, but just had a bad day (bad conditions, whatever), why should I curse the whole day..why should I be angry with me and the whole world!?
I still have to learn a lot, but I'm so glad to have realized this mistake before leaving Mallorca and all my lovely friends there.

But as I've said...I was and I am still a climber....I was still looking forward to doing some nice projects.
I trained hard and I wanted to try something hard during my "holidays in Austria." :)
Until the day where I started enjoying my stay I was counting days (until I can go home), and sometimes it seemed that time wasn't passing at all, but from then on everthing went fast and easily....nearly to fast, because I knew Davis would leave Mallorca on the 23rd and go back to the States...


With the feeling that nothing will be the same anymore when returning to Mallorca in January I left Mallorca with a quite strange mindset...happy but sad at the same time.

After landing in Vienna my mind got clearer again and I tried to focus on my plans for the next two weeks.
I had already chosen a project for my holidays...after 1 1/2 years of sport climbing I felt the desire to do some bouldering again.
In July I was working on some boulders, but only for training...and then the Austrian "summer" began (!rain rain rain!)
But I digress! On of the boulders I tried back this summer was the "Right Traverse" at Rapunzelwand in Peggau, a really nice 7c fb problem, deserving a better name.
It consists of two parts: the boulder (itself) and some endurance climbing afterwards.
The second part was no problem after checking out the movements and is probably something around 6c (?) itself.
Already on Monday (I arrived in Vienna on Sunday) I was out on the rocks to try it....and it looked promising, though I couldn't send it.
The rest I can shorten: The second day was supernice, but I was very tired, because I had partied two days before. The following day was even worse.....I was soooo tired. My muscles hurt and all in all I felt really bad.
And just a day after I was already sick.... :-(

I hope to convalesce and give it some more tries before leaving Austria for another 1 1/2 months, but if not it will be ok too.

I'm glad to have the certainty now, that my skin problems will not continue after returning to Austria in February, because my skin was nice as always during these 3 boulder-days here, at home! ;-)

Here is a video of my best try so far....it would have been only one more hard move to the beginning of the second and easier part of the traverse:

Nothing more to say than: Happy new year!!! See you in 2015! ;)